Twenty years ago when my niece was born, I tried to think of the best life-long gift that I could possibly give her and one day the answer appeared, simply and perfectly. No judgment. Just love forever. (NJJLF).
Over the years, I have found that affirmation to be true, loving and kind.
What does it mean to me, “No judgment. Just love forever?”
First, no judgment. Quite challenging if you think about. Every day with all the social media and electronic media and pundits and talk shows, we find ourselves able to place and post judgment on everything from political candidates, party views, the State of the Union (Really? Did we have to look so divided in front of the entire world? Personally, I think we could at least feel good about gas prices and mortgage rates.), the latest news, whom we feel is the best at dancing on the latest talent show, the boss’s latest decisions and the Academy Awards. Every moment of every day, we can and often do place judgment on everything from the weather, how our hair looks, to the kind of day we had at work.
Judgment is placed on all manner of things – and sometimes rightfully so when there is justice and mercy to be determined and lives to save.
In our daily lives, however, as long as we are not breaking laws and being unkind to others, we humans have a lot of freedom to choose the direction of our lives. We can choose the schools we attend, our friends, our food, whether to study or go to a movie, whether to choose a life long partner and where we want to live and work.
So no judgment means just that. Sweet Niece, make the important, smart choices that I know you will make. And when you realize the choice you made wasn’t the best, be grateful for that opportunity to learn for the future.
And then, just love forever means exactly that. My goal is to support you, watch you fly, not encumber you. Celebrate the excitement that is your life. No matter where you go, you can know I am there for you.
But I am not writing this just for you, my niece. I want to expand it so much more. To celebrate all the many ways to find The Divine in our lives. And to share the love that emanates therefrom.
I have lived too long where I have worried about the judgments of others. It has caused me to miss some times good times with family and friends that I should not have missed.
So tonight, I am giving myself a break, too. No judgment, Crissy. Do what your heart tells you to do. Go where it calls you. The Divine loves me, too. And as far as judgment goes, I believe The Divine meets each of us where we are – because if The Divine is anything, The Divine is love.